User:DarthMasterChief
Oh hi.
I uh... well I'm not good at describing myself...
So.. yeah.
I make art sometimes.
I found out about Jonathan Coulton when I was playing Portal, and wanted to download Still Alive. In searching I found Spiff's video for Re: Your Brains. I viewed a few more, including Creepy Doll, Mandelbrot Set and Bacteria. I then searched for him on Wikipedia, and found his site. Then I got bored and came here. I clicked random page and was taken to a bunch of stuff about some random drug. Later I found a discussion that they are trying to be deleted. I wanted to help so I made an account.
I'm also 14.
Also I edit some of the lyrics in some JoCo songs to make them more like something else, most of them based on the Halo storyline, of which I am a fanatic. For example here is Dance, Sergeant Johnson, Dance:
A voice like honey, no one else could fill his boots
The Elites and Jackals, the Grunts and the Brutes
He shoots ‘em down with perfection and grace
He’s done by noon, he goes home to his place
Where he sleeps and he waits for the night
Just before midnight he gets up, gets out of bed
A bottle of water, a cigar to clear his head
He gets his shades, now he’s headed downtown
Picks up one pie, puts another one down
And his body hums and the music’s playing
Dance, Sergeant Johnson, dance
It’s a cold galaxy, nobody understands
The feeling you can’t keep inside
Go, Avery Johnson, go
All the club kids are watching your plasmas glow
With the light of a truth you can’t hide
That the war is the war, but the dance goes on forever
He shimmies his shoulders, undulates his strong hips
Arms akimbo, Jaggeresque, he pouts his lips
A crowd has formed, they are gathering round
Just to hear the incredible sound
Of a genius smashing expectations
Dance, Sergeant Johnson, dance
It’s a cold Earth, nobody understands
The feeling you can’t keep inside
Go, Sergeant Johnson, go
All the club kids are watching your Spike grenade glow
With the light of a truth you can’t hide
That the war is the war, but the dance goes on forever
He’s dancing, he’s a machine
Like no one, that they’ve ever seen
He’s flying, he’s living a dream
The magic fades as Sol comes up, it’s time to leave
A hand on his shoulder, he turns around: it’s Jilan al-Cygni
He takes her hand, spins her body just so
He holds her close, they will never let go
As the room explodes, they dance like angels
Dance, Avery Johnson, dance
It’s a cold world, nobody understands
The feeling you can’t keep inside
Go, Sergeant Johnson, go
All the club kids are watching your cigar glow
With the light of a truth you can’t hide
That the dance is the dance, but the war goes on forever
And here's Master Chief Set:
Homicidal monsters! cried the terrified marine
Every one of them is a plasma in my ass
I hate the Prophets and the Unggoy
I fear the Jiralhaene, yeh,
And this Sangheili makes me want to cry
And a million miles away a Sergeant shot his gun
On a cold Eridanus day a man named John-117 was born
His disdain for Artificial Intelligence and his unique battlefield insights
Left him well equipped to face the Covies down
He saw that infinite ammo could be made by triple As
He used his big BR to turn the war around
And he looked below the storm and saw a vision in his head
A purple female form
He picked his AR up and he shot his foes down
Throw a sticky called P in a complex field
Let P blow up a bunch of Cs
And let P blow up more Cs
And let P blow up more Cs and so on
If the series of P’s should always stay
Close to me and never trend away
Then you’re basically fucked
Master Chief you’re a Spartan on fire
You’re a glowing plasma
You’re a blue box of grenadas[sic]
You’re one badass fucking human
And you’re just in time to save the day
Sweeping all our fears away
You can save the Earth in a tiny way
MC’s in heaven, at least he will be when he’s dead
Right now he’s still alive and killing Covenant
He gave us order out of chaos, he gave us hope where there was none
And his pistol succeeds where others fail
If you ever lose your way, a Sergeant Major’ll shoot his gun
From a million miles away, a little miracle will come to take you home
Just throw a sticky called P in a complex field
Let P blow up a bunch of Cs
And let P blow up more Cs
And let P blow up more Cs and so on
If the series of P’s should always stay
Close to me and never trend away
Then you’re not the Chief
Master Chief you’re a ninja on fire
You’re a glowing frickin’ plasma
You’re a square shaped box of frags
You’re one lucky fucking SPARTAN
And you’re just in time to save the day
Sweeping all our fears away
You can save the Earth in a tiny way
And you’re just in time to save the day
Sweeping all our fears away
You can save the Earth in a tiny way
Go on save the Earth in a tiny way
Come on save the Earth in a tiny way
When the normal Master Chief isn't enough... | (Just call me Darth)
