User talk:GabrielleInouye

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Let’s be clear, I do want to be chaste and single, but it feels like everywhere we turn, it gets more and more difficult. Sex is just out there to see, whether one likes it or not. None of them help. The worst of them, though, is Christian media. Why? the focus on church scandals and sexual sin. The more the church does damage scandal control, the less time there is to focus on the virgin celibate people who never get any spotlight time. One thing I wish people would address is the fact that it is so not easy being a virgin. We focus on Christian headlines showing Christians failings sexually, but what if you are a Christian who hasn’t even had an opportunity to be sexual for so long? People in Christian circles just imagine virginity as something easy to accomplish. From firsthand experience, this has been my hardest battle ever, especially since I just turned 25. I never thought it could be so hard, but it is. For 25 years, I’ve barely been kissed and that’s it. I’ve heard people say they wouldn’t date a virgin, thus they wouldn’t date me. I’ve heard people say that first time will suck, so they wouldn’t want to be my first. I’ve basically been railroaded into this “virgin zone” that no one wants to be in and everyone wants to be out of. At my age, living in a culture where everyone has already lost their virginity with kids by this time, I feel strange being an adult virgin, and it’s discomforting, even in church. Ever since I turned 25, I have suffered feelings of discomfort, anxiety, insecurity, and embarrassment because I am a virgin. I would love to say I only experience this from the world, but I experience this in church too. Statistics show that the numbers aren’t any better there either with premarital sex. You would think that would lead to an appreciation of virginity, but it just has led to being an outsider for not being married & having or dating & potentially having sex. Frustrating.